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एक अक्षर ...

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  सुनो... किसी दिन,  किसी मोड़ पे शायद तुम्हारा मेरा सामना हो ही गया तो क्या करोगे ? क्या मुझे पहचान पाओगे? या फिर अपनी धुन में चलते  रहोगे।  कुछ बातों के हज़ार मतलब होते हैं और कुछ  बातों का कोई मतलब नहीं होता। शायद हम इन मतलबों में ही उलझ के जीते रहेंगे। और फिर एक दिन एक दूसरे को  कोसेंगे कि मेरी बात का क्या मतलब निकालते रहे।  खैर, तुम्हे ये  एहसास ही नहीं कि कितनी दुआएं  मांगी हैं मैंने तुम्हारे इक दीदार के  लिए।  हिज्र की शब कई जन्मों तक बनी रहे, शायद यही तक़दीर हो. शायद मेरे हाथों में तुम्हारे नाम की लकीर तो हो पर टूटी फूटी।  इसलिए रोज़ हाथदेखती  हूँ... तुम्हारे नाम के अक्षरों को उनमें ढूंढ़ती हूँ।  मगर आज तक एक भी अक्षर नहीं  मिला।   image: www. pexels.com . 

Tum hi aana

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Tumhare bina ye baadal bhi saabun ki jhaag ki tarha lagte hain... aasmaan ka neelapan bhi na jane kahaan kho gya hai...  🎶 Meri neendon ko chhu kar tum jo sapne yu sajaate ho In aankhon ke kinaaron se ye aansu kyo hataate ho. Wafaa se puchh lo jakar bina waade tujhe chaaha. Bahot aayi gyi yaadein magar is baar tumhi aana.🎶 Ye sunte sunte baadlon ko keh rahi hoon ki itna sannaata aaj kyo hai... tumhari hasi kyo nhi goonj rahi, kyo aankhon ko tumhare chehre ka intezaar hai... tumhari awaaz ka intezaar hai.tumhara intezaar hai... 🎶 Tere jane ka gam, aur na aane ka gam, Phir zamaane ka gam kya karein? Raah dekhe nazar, raat bhar jaag kar Par teri toh khabar na mile.🎶 Ab barish ka mausam bhi nhi par dekho bewaqt ki barish bhi tumhari yaadon jaisi hi hain... itni umas hai is tadap ki... ki aankhon ka barasna bhi jaise zaruri ho gya hai. Judaa log hote hain... dil toh kabhi judaa nhi hote. 🎶 Bahot aayi gyi yaadein,  magar is baar tumhi aana. Iraade phir se jaane ke nhi laana...  tumhi aa

On the brink of being vulnerable...

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How slow we made it...to this. Slowly hearing out our hearts, our sore wounds that would always ache like hell. We comforted each other only to leave back our skins that no longer served us.  Do you really think we have to be this vulnerable? I get scared at the mention of it. May be I dont know how to or may be my walls are so thick that I cannot break them.  Each day I have cemented one more layer over them. Now it seems more like a grave enclosing me in, than my fortress. Do you think this is needed? The last wall to be thrashed to feel what vulnerability is?  I get scared that my armour would be destroyed, hurting me more... exposing me to something I might not be able to protect myself from. But some days.... I want to break down...show the real me to you and tell you yes it hurts to miss you... to love you because I can live, knowing that it's safe to love you from a distance than to find myself crumbling under your stare....than to say that it's all a

Fallen traps

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Twenty two months...since I know her... a woman who became more than a friend to me. We met through a social site...where she posted some of her pics. The more I scrolled her profile...the more I got interested in her. At first...it was just out of curiosity... a new prey she was to me...and I wanted to trap her without any failure.This is the advantage of social sites...the victim never knows ...which information has led to her fall... there are clever ways to know how to go into that... likes ... books ... movies ... groups ... places visited ...things liked which fall in a particular emotion...like sad songs, etc. I had mastered this art since the beginning days of Facebook. And if you take my advice...stalking someone quietly is more advantageous than blowing the trumpet by liking their posts or commenting continuously. But sometimes the predator becomes the prey itself. But my case is different. It all started with a friend request....loz... sounds the title of Ravinde

What if I never get over you...

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What if I never get over you... Love is as confusing as hating.... both consume enormous energy . The only thing that differs is the way we express them. After believing for a lifetime that a person can get over someone by hating, I understood that it's never possible.  Even though we move on... we move away from that love, we want to forget, we want never to go through the same again... But ... that person still holds the very spot in our heart, eventhough we ignore... looking through them like they dont exist but the truth is, love cannot be taken back... you cannot unlove them. Hating them is just a mask we put over our own emotions. A mechanism to cope up, to prevent from drowning in that sad wave that we are not with them... What if I dont get closure? There are no closures in love, only divorces in marriages but never closures. There is nothing called closures because we never agree on loving someone for a while... hearts dont work that way.  W

That night...

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That night when you appeared; broken! Torn at the window of my room, The melody you played; weeped. On the strings of the harp. That night when I touched, Your heart that oozed blood. That night, when you hugged me tight, Hiding away your tears; unripe. As you teach me each night, To play the strings of harp right. The only melody you taught me, Was of broken hearts and lives. That night when you sung, For your beloved outside. Looking at the stars you recited her name, Like an unfulfilled wish to the stars. As you wrapped your wings around yourself, Embracing her as if a dream stands in eyes. I wished you had loved me the same As you thought of your Aphrodite. But I knew I cannot love an angel A forbidden thing it is to the mankind But I have fallen for you it seems... A broken shattered heart; You. Now I look at the harp untouched, May be you have forgotten about Us. I play the saddest

घर वापसी (भाग -१० और...ज़िन्दगी चलती रही )

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भाग- १ यहाँ पढ़ें https://www.loverhyme.com/2018/05/blog-post_99.html  भाग -२ यहां पढ़ें https://www.loverhyme.com/2018/05/blog-post_25.html भाग ३ यहां पढ़ें  https://www.loverhyme.com/2018/05/blog-post_72.html भाग ४ यहाँ पढ़ें https://www.loverhyme.com/2018/05/blog-post_27.html भाग ५ यहां पढ़ें https://www.loverhyme.com/2018/06/blog-post_13.html भाग ६ यहां पढ़ें  https://www.loverhyme.com/2018/07/blog-post_5.html भाग ७ यहां पढ़ें https://www.loverhyme.com/2018/10/blog-post.html भाग ८ यहां पढें https://www.loverhyme.com/2018/11/blog-post.html भाग ९ यहां पढ़ें https://www.loverhyme.com/2019/01/blog-post.html घर वापसी (भाग -१०  और...ज़िन्दगी चलती रही ) मैं बीच सड़क चली जा रही थी... सामने से आती हुई कार, बस...मुझे कुछ नज़र नहीं आया। सब कुछ तो पहले ही लुट चूका था मेरा। वापसी की आस भी अब ख़तम हो चुकी... अब किधर जाऊ ? अम्माजी के यहाँ वापसी का मतलब उन भूखे भेड़ियों का फिर शिकार बन जाऊँ ।  घर बचा ही कहाँ..... मायेका तो शादी पे ही पराया हो गया और ससुराल.... वो तो अब किसी और के हिस